Don’t Be A Turd

“Vanity can easily overtake wisdom. It usually overtakes common sense.” – Julian Casablancas

By Walter Price

Thanks Julian, you would certainly know…

I started this blog to celebrate what is good or should I say Great! in the music scenes. I’ve spent more years than I care to elaborate on as a DJ, violinist (and horrible drummer), syndicated show host, band manager, other this and that’s and a lifelong lover of killer music. At some point in the last few years I just got worn out putting up with and listening to over inflated and not going to be around here long enough to care about anyway musicians it boggles the ole mind.

Here’s the thing, I’ve been thinking for some time now, like years, about why ‘hipster’ artists get a bad rap from music fans and diehard aficionados. It’s not just people disagreeing on the sounds coming from these acts. The sounds that are clear versions of things past or perhaps a culmination of genres mixed and tweaked into a bit of interesting (or not). Sounds that the cheesiest of artists will claim they invented.

Over the years I’ve lived among the so called hipsters (Williamsburg Brooklyn ones), had them in the studio, in my house, broke bread with them, had some laughs and fights, loaned them gas/drink/other ‘things’ money, nearly been tossed into the pokey with a few, become friends with some and have found that most have huge hearts and Rock N’ Roll in their blood and the other 40% of these music makers to be absolute self-righteous douche nozzles. (Names you know and mostly names you wouldn’t…)

Listening to Grizzly Bear (perceptually not douche nozzles) this morning I went about searching the web for some accompanying words to read as I soaked up the sounds and ran across the LA Weekly article from 2012 that had a ring to it 20 Worst Hipster Bands (By Ben Westhoff / staff).

Although I can say the list is kinda silly (in a humorous way) and isn’t all that fair (mainly due to the fact that opinions are like arseholes…), it does have me interested in coming clean with a few thoughtful tidbits. Let’s call it advice or perhaps, yeah, never mind, it’s advice. Things I’ve noticed over the years and even a little more so since creating this amazing blog. (I didn’t invent the music blog)

Here are my thoughts on what ‘hipsters’ or any other douchy sorts should consider:

1. No matter how much you want to believe, you did NOT create Rock N’ Roll (or any variation thereof).
2. Everything people ‘love’ about you now they will easily hate you for in short time. Probably.
3. You are not and will never ever be the second coming of The Beatles, The Kinks, Gram Parsons or even Nirvana. If you are or will be, the people and history will decide this not you and your foxy haircut.
4. Wanna last? Focus on your music and not the music scene. Substance paired with honesty goes oodles further than the right crowd.
5. When you decide you’ve become more important than the people who love your music, you lose sucka!
6. Do What You Say You’re Going To Do. If you or your people set up something or another to promote your sounds, tours or anti-puppy farm crusade…Show-Up do your thing. Easy.
7. STOP BEING AN ASSHOLE. This isn’t new information, no one really wants to be around or trust in a belligerent narcissist for the long haul.
8. A little respect never hurt anyone. (not scientifically proven)

(side note: if you’re naturally socially awkward, these things do not apply to you.I blame your parents.)

A bit of Rock N’ Roll attitude has always been really cool and intriguing but have you ever noticed that the greatest legends of rock personas had the music to back it up? That kinda stopped sometime in the late 70’s. When going against the establishment via the ‘establishment’ seemed extraordinary and righteous. (I’m talking to you John Lydon). It got blown out of proportion from there.

Very few artists get lucky enough for masses to adore them. Attention spans are even shorter now and will continue to decrease as technology and social media turn us further into robots. Take this time have some fun and live some Rock N’ Roll while you’re making music and enjoy it brothers & sisters. If you want to be an arsehole, we’ll see ya at the bottom of the heap soon enough. That would be horrible indeed, wouldn’t it…

You may also like: 10 Reasons Why Your Band Won’t Succeed 

Now that I think about it, I guess I could have saved time and just advised that you not be a well-dressed turd with mediocre sounds. Other than that, may the force be with you.

Right, anyhoo, here is the list of ‘worst hipster bands’ according to LA Weekly that got all this jibber jabber started. What’s even better is Ben Westhoff’s mea culpa not really a mea culpa. You can check that out here.

1. Bon Iver
2. tUnE-yArDs
3. Arcade Fire
4. Bright Eyes
5. Grizzly Bear
6. Beirut
7. Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti
8. The Airborne Toxic Event
9. Beach House
10. White Rabbits
11. Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros
12. Pomplamoose
13. The Decemberists
14. Wavves
15. Death Cab For Cutie
16. MGMT
17. Fun.
18. Sleigh Bells
19. TV On The Radio
20. The Black Keys

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