30. June 2014
Why Do We Fail?
By J.P. Kallio
I’ve been thinking about success a lot lately. And by success I don’t mean any kind of celebrity status, but more like personal success. We all take on tasks and challenges all the time whether it’s your career oriented or personal challenges. Whether as a musician you set out to record an album organize a tour, or maybe you go after a promotion or pay rise in your job. Or you set out to exercise regularly, lose weight or something as simple as keep your house clean. We all set goals for our self all throughout our lives. We also fail at them all the time. But the occasional success feels so rewarding, that we want more. We set our sights higher. And even though I had my fellow musicians in mind while writing this, everyone can take something out of this post.
I have noticed a pattern in myself and numerous people around me, which definitely would be the first obstacle in success, and that is the fact that we give up the first time we stumble. Imagine yourself as a kid learning to walk. Did you fall? I bet you did. In fact I bet you did hundreds, if not even thousands of times. But still you kept trying. Imagine if you could have that same perseverance with whatever your goal is? And this is something I have noticed lot of successful people have in common. When they fall down, instead crying about it, they analyse why they fell down, learn from their mistakes, get up and try again. Let’s take the weight loss as an example, just because so many of us have been there somewhere along the way. So we set out on the new fab diet, we follow it meticulously… For few weeks. Then we have a small slip. A night out. We have few too many drinks, munch on salty peanuts during the night, and on the way home we devour a massive take away. So we slipped, so what? But the next day we feel like a failed. So we proceed to dump the diet and go back to our old habits, instead of just continuing where we left off. We all know deep down it takes time. So why do we refuse to accept it?
Another thing I’ve noticed and have been guilty of, is not appreciating the success when it comes. We always think things will be better at the next milestone. Why can’t we enjoy the ride? Why can’t we enjoy the moment? If we did enjoy the journey as much as the destination, maybe we would not mind few setbacks on the way, maybe we could see them as a “scenic route”, or just a small character building exercise.
When I was young, I wanted things bad. Now I probably want certain things even more, but I am willing to take my time. I am willing to fight the good fight along the way instead of expecting things just handed to me. Success for me used to be something that was almost unachievable, high up in the stars. Now it is something that I can achieve with plenty of hard and smart work. I enjoy the journey; I enjoy the challenges and rewards. And if all else fails, I make myself a new cup of fresh coffee, stick on some nice music and once again everything seems possible.
J.P. Kallio is a singer / songwriter / coffee aficionado